Speed Friending for Moms

 After moving around SO MANY TIMES the past 10 years of my life, I am like so over making friends. I know, I know, that sounds really bad. I just wish there was a faster way to make friends. 

So why can't we have speed friending for moms, you know, like speed dating? I mean, I think I'm on to something here. Everyone could come up with a list of questions that you want answered that would help you decide if you were compatible with one another. We could all meet at a great restaurant and everyone would have three minutes with each person. There would be a timer and a bell. And wine. After years of moving I can pretty much tell within the first few minutes of interaction if it will last beyond the first conversation. So if I could just have a few minutes with twenty different women, I could probably narrow down my options. 

That being said, I'm now going to say the complete opposite. I've also been surprised. I've learned over the years that first impressions are sometimes mostly wrong. In fact, I am typically the person who makes a terrible first impression. So I beg of you, give me another chance (and another glass of wine) and I'll make a great second impression! We as people, and especially as girls and women, seem to think that we should be hanging out with people who are just like us. That we have a “type”. And I just think we have it all wrong. Yes, as a mother, a lot of my friends are also mothers. And when we were military, most of my friends were military too. They were my people. They “got” me; we had a lot in common; it was easy.

But as I've gotten older I've realized that having something in common is not always the first step to a good relationship. Some of my closest friends are women who are completely different than me. Women who don't have children, women who have children in different stages of life than mine, women who don't have a college degree, women who are pastor's wives, women who have lost their husband, women who work full time, and women who live across the country from me.




Having something in common with someone doesn't always mean you'll hit it off. There are 

women I have met and I think, "We should be friends because we have everything in common!" But 

we just don't click. Sometimes people who you least expect make the best of friends. I've also realized 

that I like women who are different than I am. I like someone who thinks differently than I do (it makes 

for some great conversation), whose goals are different than mine (it makes me re- evaluate my goals), 

whose sense of humor is different than mine (everyone is funny in their own way). 

But I do think speed friending would be a great way to start the friend making process, right?  It would be kind of an ice breaker, a quick intro to who you are. Then maybe we can just skip those first few awkward and uncomfortable encounters and get to the fun parts. 

So what kind of questions would you ask if you were going to speed friend? 

Here are a few of mine:

1. Do you talk the entire way through movies because you feel compelled to comment on everything? Oh good, me too.

2. Do you sometimes serve cereal for dinner and not feel bad about it? Yeah, me too.

3. Do you make your own deodorant? hhmm.....

4. Do you like wine? Yes, we can be besties.

5. Would you judge me for watching Sister Wives? Yeah, I know, I sometimes judge myself. Hey, we all have things we are ashamed of.

6. Do you understand and appreciate sarcasm? Like a lot of it? Because I'm sarcastic about 50% of the time. No, that's not true, its more like 75% of the time. Can you handle that? Some people can't. 

7. Will you promise to not tell me the birth stories for each of your children? And I promise not to tell you mine. 

Mom hacks:  things that will help you as a mom and/or things I love and think you should love too! 


This soup is so good. It's kind of like tortilla soup, taco soup, and chili had a baby.....

I'm very into soup and using my crock pot in the the Fall.

This printable has been helpful for Savannah. It hangs on the fridge so she can easily find it when she packs her lunch. 

I LOVE Tea Collection and I REALLY LOVE when their sale stuff is an additional 20% off. You're Welcome. 






Stitch Fix, Rent the Runway, and Blue Apron: What I really think

Before I begin, I just want to note that the word convenience pops up in this post about one thousand times. I know. I should find a thesaurus. 


Stitch Fix: My 1 year review





Pros: So fun! My favorite aspect of Stitch Fix is that is is just hands down fun. You can pin styles you like on Pinterest and your 'stylist' will look at your profile and put together five pieces she thinks you might like. Also, you can put in specific requests- like you have date night coming up and want something for the occasion. The box arrives on your porch with items inside neatly wrapped in tissue paper and perfectly folded. Inside you will find a style guide giving different ways you can wear each piece. I always feel so special when this pretty little box shows up on my doorstep and it's all for me.




So convenient! Okay yes, I have time to shop, and I like to shop. But nothing beats cute clothes showing up to your door that someone else picked especially for you. The items you don't want, you send back within a few days in an already supplied prepaid envelope. I could see how convenience could be a huge plus if you are short on time. 




Element of surprise! If you have major control issues and you want to know exactly what you are getting, maybe this is not for you. Sometimes SF sends me things that I would not have picked out on my own. But some clothes look better on you than on the hanger (or folded up in a box), so I always try everything on and there have been a few times that I've kept something that I initially thought I wouldn't like. I like this aspect because I tend to choose the same patterns and styles. I need another gray/black/neutral top like Tom Brady needs another deflated football (wait, what?). 




Cons: Some things are alike (or are exactly alike). I now own two of the same shirts in different patterns (clearly I liked the shirt enough to actually keep them both though)! Also, I am starting to feel like it all kind of looks alike. It's like eating at Chick- fil- a, which I love, but sometimes it doesn't matter if I eat a salad or the original chicken sandwich...they kind of taste alike. But I'll keep going back. Oh yes, I'll never not go to Chick-fil-a. This is sometimes how I feel about SF and all of their clothes....

Overpriced at times: Sometimes I think, “how on earth is this $68.00?”, some things are just way overpriced. Or maybe I'm just cheap. Yes, I'm cheap.

Rent the Runway



Why I LOVE it: Convenience, hello! Yes, once again, I have time to go to a bunch of stores and try on dresses. But no, I really don't want to spend my day doing that. Especially when I have one day to do it because someone didn't decide if he wanted to go to an event until the last minute. But this shows up to your door, ready to wear.

Wearing a style you would never buy: Sometimes I wish I owned a platinum blond pixie cut wig because that's what I would really love to do with my hair. But let's face it, I'll never do it. At least not on this side of 50. So RTR is like that...sure, rent that jumpsuit (see pic) but don't keep it! I'm pretty sure the jumpsuit will not be a “classic” look in 2020. But that's just my professional opinion.




Easy Peasy: It comes in a hanging black bag, all items dry cleaned, on hangers and ready to wear! Returns are just as easy. Wad it all up and throw it in the bag and drop it at a UPS drop box.

Will I use it again? Absolutely. I'm hoping Tyson's company has a big fancy shmancy Christmas party just so I have an excuse to use it again. It's great if you don't want to commit to a dress you may only wear once or twice. And it's great if you like wearing something different to every event you attend. 

Why I COULD have hated it: It may not have fit! Coming from a lady with a small waist, but some big time hips and butt...things do not always fit as they should. This is why I hate jeans. And shopping for jeans. BUT, my items may not have fit, or looked like they did on the 5' 9” 110 pound model. And this was a huge concern of mine. Which is why RTR gives you a second size for FREE. I love free and I love that they did this- it is what sold me on the whole thing!

 It was a risk! If it hadn't fit, I woulda been out some money (although I think the prices are reasonable and there is a whole range of prices) and still without a dress. And would still have had to gone speed shopping and probably ended up with something sub par.

* I only have one picture of me in the jumpsuit rental from Rent the Runway. And it's not even my picture. Someone else took it with their phone because I like to be living life and living in the moment and not trying to constantly capture pictures for social media.  I'm just a lazy picture taker. I just really suck at remembering to take pictures. 

me in my jumpsuit





Blue Apron


          I was introduced to BA by a friend who signed me up for 2 free meals. I don't know about you, but I can't turn down free food. Or free anything. 




Pros: Convenient! Ah, that word again. I bet you wish I had used that thesaurus now...  But you are paying for them to do the meal planning, shopping, and the food. Think of it that way and it may be worth the $. Sometimes the hardest thing for me is coming up with dinner ideas and actually doing the shopping. Especially in the summer with my two kiddos complaining and asking to buy every other item we pass (Luke once asked to buy Gluten free Kale chips because HE DIDN'T EVEN LOOK AT WHAT HE WAS PICKING UP). BA shows up (in a refrigerated box) on your door. No shopping, no buying of the kale chips.




It was delish! Both of my kids approved, which means a lot. They are my toughest critics. 


New recipes and unique ingredients! I get stuck in recipe ruts periodically. And even Pinterest cannot help me generate new dinner ideas and pull me out of my deepest rut sometimes! This was fun because the four meals I cooked were different than my typical "go to" meals. I also picked up a new technique to cook chicken that I have used since. Bonus!

Quick: The 4 recipes I have made I prepared in 40 minutes or less. This is HUGE for me. If you are pressed at dinner time because of school, sports, and homework then these meals were straightforward, easy, and quick to prepare. 

Cons: Expensive! $70.00 for 2 meals (that feeds 4) is expensive! Like way expensive in my opinion. For us, this is not sustainable. I stay at home, we are not a dual income- au pair-cleaning- lady-private school-vacation -all-the-time kind of family. Although I'm not opposed to this idea. But I am able to meal plan, shop, and prepare. And most weeks I don't mind it and sometimes I (gasp) enjoy it! I decided that doing BA once every other month to give myself a little break and be slightly indulgent is acceptable. But we can't actually do it every week for every meal. We just can't.

If you don't cancel or skip a meal a week before a scheduled delivery then you are automatically scheduled for a delivery, so you HAVE TO PLAN AHEAD. And put it on your phone calendar with an alert. Or you will receive a meal. And it might include shepherds pie or salmon with bok choy. And you might not like those options. But you might have already been charged the $70.00 so you might have to eat it.

There is a lot of chopping of the veggies: These meals do include a lot of fresh vegetable which I hugely appreciate! It translates to it being a healthy, fresh meal- so I don't mind too much. It's just that....I hate to chop is all.

To sum it all up...can you guess?.....All of these 'deliver to your door' companies are incredibly CONVENIENT! 

Mom hacks:  things that will help you as a mom and/or things I love and think you should love too! 

This candle is like Fall wrapped up and wafting through my house. I'm obsessed. 

T.V. Indulgence: BBC is where it's at. Those British people have the acting thing down. And the drama thing. And those accents don't hurt either. Happy Valley is a 6 episode mini series that is worth your watch. You may even spot a familiar face in the cast (think Downton Abbey). Watch it while you fold laundry, then you won't feel so guilty for just sitting there. Or is that just me?

Great workout to pair with a long run or bike ride!

This cinnamon apple coffee cake is da bomb (do people even use that phrase anymore?) and since I have 2 pecks of apples (that's half a bushel if you were wondering) I'm making all things apple until they are gone. 

Hello Real World and Civilian Life!

Why hello there real world! 

I have been anxiously awaiting to lead the civilian life for quite some time now. Like since we made the decision to leave the Navy in January of 2014 but had to wait until the Spring of 2015. Those 18 months were a joy. But not really.

I am loving civilian life for several reasons. First, T works 9-5 8-6. He kisses us all goodbye in the morning, he's at Luke's football practices and is home for dinner. We even get to plan trips in advance.  I consider this a win, and a far cry from our “norm” in the Navy. Also, no deployments in the real world. Yeah, my husband doesn't leave for six months at a time while I try and “hold down the fort”. Although I'd be lying if I said I wasn't looking forward to some one week business trips... cereal for dinner, crappy t.v., reading in bed late into the night, less laundry... Lastly, him not climbing into a metal death trap (also known as a helicopter) on a regular basis is a plus. Especially one that seems prone to crashing.

But, um, let's talk about things I am not loving about the real world. Let's talk about medical insurance for just a sec. TriCare Prime was A-MA-ZING. Yes, I know, it has it's issues and can be a real pain in the ass sometimes, but um, hello, IT WAS (essentially)FREE. My hospital stay for having Savannah (with an emergency C-section) was $33.00. Luke's 6 ER visits (we are averaging one a year people!) and 2 ambulance rides, well, never saw those bills.  Prescriptions, if filled on base, were FREE. Although as Tyson likes to say, “nothing is ever free”. I mean there was this terrible numbering system where you drew a number, waited 20 minutes then went to a window and handed them the number. Then they would tell you they would have it filled in 45 minutes. So not especially convenient when you have sick children and an unreliable spouse and need the medicine like right now. So sometimes I'd get it filled “out in town”- ya know, with the locals, the civilians, the others. And then I'd have to pay $3.00 or something. Once when it was $10.00 I was like, “why is this so expensive?” So please imagine my SHOCK and HORROR when I was told that Luke's epi pen would be $90.00. For a brief moment I thought maybe he doesn't really need to have it.... But then I paid and I was so sad. Sad about not having TriCare Prime. Sad that my kid has stupid allergies.

And let's not forget about the commissary. For you lay people out there, that's the grocery store on base. And it is oh so special. And I miss it. And I miss their sushi! And my grocery bill is completely out of control and I am still trying to figure out how to get it back down to my pre-civilian days. sigh.

Thank you real world for mostly being pretty great.

Mom hacks: things that will help you as a mom and/or things I love and think you should love too!

I love reading and I especially love reading in the fall and winter as it actually gets cold here (in Maryland) and I don't go outside when its cold. I huddle by the fire and count down the days until Spring. And I read. The last book I read that I could.not.put.down was The Nightingale. Yes mom, I know its sad so you couldn't read it. If you are one of those people(like my mom) who can't read sad books or watch sad movies(for the love- it can't always be a happy ending) then fine, don't read this book. But you're missing out on a great book!

Having a bad day? Buy someone else a coffee. No seriously. Participating in altruistic behaviors makes us happy (a little tidbit that I picked up- and more importantly remembered- from PSYC 101). Making someone else happy in turn makes you happy. Go to Starbucks and get that Pumpkin Spice latte and while you're at it, buy the other exhausted, overworked, overlooked person in the car behind
you a coffee. It'll make their day, and yours too. Win win.  

We went apple picking yesterday. Here is the applesauce recipe I made last night. It's easy, delicious, and...delicious. 

And I'm still over here singing the praises of  the Skimm. If you haven't checked it out yet, well, you should. And then when there is grown up conversation you can chime in and talk about the Pope's visit to the US. And Donald Trumps orange skin tone. And you can make witty comments and people think you keep up on your current events, when really, you just skimmed.

An unposted post from last year: A change will do you good

 At the beginning of the year (2014) Tyson and I had to make a very serious and grown-up decision. Do you ever feel like you're not qualified to make some of the decisions you have to make? Like, I know I'm 30, but I don't feel like I'm equipped to be making decisions that impact my life and the life of our family.
  It can be daunting, but T and I work well together making decisions. I'm not bragging or anything, because there are some things we don't do well together (please don't ever invite us over to play Trivial Pursuit or any other trivia game. or any game. and do not put us on the same team), but making big decisions is something we do well together. We can talk a decision to death, play devil's advocate,  and then put the decision away. We can pull it out days, weeks, and months later to talk about it again, to reexamine what we have each been thinking and see where life has led us and put the decision in that new context. Because some decisions require months and years to make. Some decisions need more than a good night's sleep. And those decisions are the big ones. The ones you'll look back on and remember the day you made it.
  We had to decide if T (and our family) wanted to continue the military life or if we were ready to get out and become part of the real civilian world. Yeah, big decision. He wasn't being forced out. He had just come to the end of the time he owed, which was ten years. We also had to make the decision before he was written another set of orders and before he was up for the 04 promotion (Lieutenant Commander). So this decision had to be made 18 months before we would actually get out. So big stuff here. No waiting around to see what would happen; we had to be proactive about this decision. So after lots of deliberation and so.much.talking. we decided that getting out of the Navy is what would be best for our family.
  The Navy has been all we have ever known as a couple and as a family. We move when they say, go where they send us, and he deploys when he's told. We've celebrated birthdays and anniversaries apart. I've bought a car without him, taken my 13 month old to the ER without him, evacuated with a toddler and a puppy, and completed my Master's degree with a 2 year old while pregnant. All while he was gone. We have done so much of life apart. And we are just ready to do the rest of it together. We uproot our family, leaving behind new friends, schools, homes, and memories to begin again. and again. and again. Although this life is not easy, I wouldn't change a thing about it.
  But it is a new season for our family and the idea of being able to choose where we live, have a husband who doesn't leave 6 months out of the year, a home our family can grow up in, and making friends we don't have to say goodbye to two years later sounds pretty good right now. And yeah, I know the grass is always greener on the other side...but that grass looks pretty darn green right about now. And it's a risk we are willing to take, even if it turns out the grass is exactly the same on both sides of the fence.

Oh, how do I feel about all of this? Excited. Anxious. Hopeful. Scared. Ecstatic. And all of that at the same time. For New Years this year I wrote down one word that I wanted to own this year. The word was adventurous, and I feel like if anything else, this decision will give us one heck of an adventure.



Mom hacks:

-I absolutely love This coffee mug! I just think every mom should have one. Like, give me 10 minutes to drink my coffee in silence. and peace. shhh.

-If you don't feel like being addicted to cocaine, you should become addicted to this candy corn bark instead.

-I'm currently obsessed with this highlighter for my face. It makes me look shimmery and youthful and well rested. yes please.